Thursday, June 16, 2011

bricks


i once had a wall
that i built
for protection.
i built it meticulously
painstakingly
oh so carefully.
brick by brick, i built it
took me long enough
but it kept me safe
so i loved it enough.
i had it for a while
and all through that time,
it protected me
blocked me
guarded me.
then someone came along
and broke it down.
i still cant figure out
if they blew out a gap
or took it apart by bricks
important thing being
my wall no longer stood strong.
at first i didnt mind
they were very careful
and caring
but it didnt last forever
as i  thought it should.
inevitably, i was hurt
still dont know if it was
irrevocable.
i suppose i hope it wasnt
for id love to be that
invincible girl once again.
im still working on rebuilding it
but i cant find the necessary tools to fix it
and im too scared to break it
all the way down
and start anew.

so here i am
with my broken wall
hurt and healing
but also smarter and stronger
and to the next person
who comes along:
watch out
i may be cracked
and slightly broken
but i dont crumble easily
anymore.

27 comments:

Steve Isaak said...

Good, interesting-structure read.

Laurie Kolp said...

Lovely concrete poem... I can definitely relate!

bbonnieblue said...

Life is like that...keep the wall but don't build it too high or too strong. Those experiences build you!

upinthecosmos said...

Love this & the layout of it really adds to the feel:-)

Chim's World of Literature said...

i love it so much, the layout, the prompt, you capture the wall we guard our hearts with so intimately and creatively....

jennirey said...

Loved your layout-- Stay out of the wall.. it gets much more lonely as you age.. and then it becomes a comfortable place to be..and then a habit, that you want to break and cannot..

Its much more risky to be vulnerable and much more rewarding.. hurt does happen.. but it can heal too..

cheers to you~~~

Jen

Fred said...

Love it. Everything about it, from projection to shape. Really, really nicely done:)

Miriam Sagan said...

Reminds me of the Robert Frost...strong "open field" layout.

Jay said...

Really nice structure.Corresponds well with the idea of the poem.Walls are meant to be broken down because once you need to rebuild it,it only gets rebuilt with a stronger,much smarter cement.It only makes you stronger :)

Peggy Nolan said...

Very interesting poem about walls and why we might build them in our hearts. I have discovered that living without a wall is better for me.

Jingle said...

superb build up.
Thanks for coming.
Happy Rally.

Thoughts Not Lost said...

Great words and inventive structure!

Ravenblack said...

Re-enforced concrete. It's tough to keep up the wall though. I enjoyed this poem a lot, the consistency and tone of it matches the poem, showing a person who has become hard. There are 'cracks' where you see the hurt but you can also see the determination not to break entirely.

teric said...

A perfect comparison to life!

Sober on the Way to Sane said...

Wonderful wall, wonderful poem

mindlovemisery said...

I love that phrase "Hurt and healing" beautiful! We all have walls but they can block us from good things too and from living fully

Poetry Road said...

I really enjoyed the layout of this poem. It made the way it read so much the better!
Great story. My favorite line:

but also smarter and stronger

Soooooo TRUE!

Bijaylaxmi said...

Lovely creation.

kshawnedgar said...

Nicely laid out piece, full of motion and flare. I'm hoping you're Sweet Pea from Sucker Punch :) I like your words.

beccagivens said...

I can definitely relate to this one ...

I like the way you created its structure from the beginning to its end ... well done!

Jack Edwards Poetry said...

Wow, a great poem with a refreshing structure. Great read.

patcegan said...

I love this poem! The idea, and the structure of the poem itself. It is true that walls we build to keep people out also make us a prisoner. This is my first visit to your blog but surely not my last! Hugs, pat

sweet pea. said...

thanks for all your lovely comments =D

Elaine Danforth said...

Sweet Pea,

I enjoyed the ride as you took me through your process of construction and deconstruction of your wall. There is even a piece of deconstruction happening visually by the time the poem starts, because it is not as dense as the actual brick wall in the photo above it. Well done!

the feeling lioness said...

I think it is just alright

Lena said...

This is a cracker of a piece! I loved the side-shifts of the verses, they fitted perfectly with the picture - and a marvellous ending to boot!!

Janice MacLeod said...

This is a strong piece, even if the wall wasn't ;-)