Friday, January 28, 2011

really though, why not?

i can write exquisitely.
i am able to place words in their spots and have them weave in and out of each other, so that they paint an elaborate picture in your mind.
i am fascinated with words, and i know how to use them.
i could write immaculate pieces if i put myself to it.


so honestly, why don't i?
because quite frankly, it feels almost fake.
and fake is something i want not to be.
ever.


when the time is right,
when the time comes,
i will write.
perfectly.
flawlessly.
impeccably.
but not yet.
not yet.

10 comments:

Barry said...

I don't know your real name but I never mentioned that my mom calls my sister "Sweet Pea" (my sister's blonde too, btw).

Like you I struggle for perfection in my writing. I'll draft a poem then rewrite it fifty times, sometimes struggling with one word or verse for weeks or months. Even afterwards I'll go back and edit sometimes.

But perfection, I feel, shouldn't be the end goal. Getting your thoughts and emotions out should. Striving for perfection is admirable, but it may be at the expense of our readers as we hold things back from them. Things that may help them see more of us, or themselves.

I hope you will at least start or if you have, never stop because anything beautiful or perfect (if there is such a thing) begins with that first action. I make note of lines and phrases that come to my mind and file them away for later even if I don't have a piece to fit them in at the time. It can all be a long, drawn-out process but the trick is not to wait until everything is JUST right, as that moment rarely comes.

I look forward to reading more of your writing.

sweet pea. said...

=) thanks barry
<3

Unknown said...

Writing is hard to perfect. I never can find words I think are perfect. I am still trying. x

Becca said...

The mystery and intrigue about writing and words is that they can be perfect in so many ways, I think. Because words can always be exchanged and replaced over and over with different words, it allows the opportunity for many perfect writings. You're a great writer, keep it up!

sweet pea. said...

barry:
hmmm maybe its a blonde thing.....

i think its not so much perfection i struggle for (although i do struggle for it) as much as trying to make whatever im writing feel as though IM writing it, not someone else.
perfection is important to me, yes. (i think i mentioned in an earlier post that im very much a perfectionist.... ) but so is non-hypocritical-ness. know what i mean? half the time, i feel as though im not really saying what i want to say, or else im saying it in a way different from my usual self..

mckenzie:
keep trying. i think youre very almost there =)

becca:
you are ever the analyzer. i agree though, that words can be exchanged and replaced and such. and thank you =)

Becca said...

Hahah I think I'm what they call an "over-analyzer" which is why half the blogs I post are about me worrying, and the worry is a result from me over analyzing.

sweet pea. said...

hahahhahahahahaha thats so funny. its not always bad to be an overanalyzer... you can see the every side of a situation.

Ayesha Monique said...

I like it :)

Becca said...

Well--true you can see every side of the situation, but at the same you worry because, at least in my case, I have ZERO control (which is how it's mean to be, God has control!) but I stress over how I don't have control. It's all a vicious cycle you see:(

sweet pea. said...

thanks, ayesha.

becca:
so you dont have control, and that worries you, so you worry about how you dont have control, and how its out of your control that you have no control and how thats also out of your control, and then your worries and stuffs just go out of control??
i feel ya.