.

oh gosh, i havent updated this thing in like, years.

im just not coming up with anything new.

so, whoever actually reads this, sorry.

ill try to post soon.

I Want.....
I Want...
..a friend
thats around
at all times.
..for people
to shut their faces
..for people
to stop hating
for reasons unknown
..a smile
..to find my
one and only
..for the world
to stop judging
..for school
to go jump
off a cliff
..to go visit
places unseen
..a few hugs
and some
chocolate
..for people
to leave me alone
when i want to be
..to walk away
from everything
and everyone
..answers
..to move
far away
..to never
grow up
and be a kid
forever
..for life to
be easier,
and not hard
like it is
..flowers
for every
occasion
..to learn
to let go
..to be happy
and not have
these
"sad attacks"
when im real sad
for no reason
..to walk
forever
..to sit
in the rain
and look up
at the stars
and let
the tears fall.
the tears
that have been
bulding up
over time
..an english muffin
with a cuppa tea
..for life
to stop,
slow down,
and wait
a minute.
because
some people
cant seem to
catch up.
..an extra large
hug please.
I want....
i want
too much

A List

just a list...

of random thoughts.



a shadow
a rose
a razor
a nose
a pencil
a blade
a curtain
a shade
a teardrop
an eye
a paper
a fly
a bottle
a pen
a leaflet
a hen
a ducky
a scrub
a ruler
a tub
an ocean
a key
a nail
at sea
a berry
a fruit
a wire
a root
a treehouse
a dart
a notebook
a heart
a rookie
a pro
a player
a hoe
a circle
a square
a piggie
a pear
a starting
a bend
a loveseat
an end
a rustle
a lip
a shower
a hip
a clipping
a slice
a lipstick
a dice
a pencil
a nose,
a shadow
a rose.

i hate you

this poem is dedicated to my friend,
one of the very best people i have
ever met or ever hope to meet.
Yana,
love ya


i hate you
youre stupid
i hate you
go away
i hate you
i hate you
i hate you
i hate....
no i don't
i can't.
you're too good
to be hated.
especially
by me
i love you too much
do i hate you?
can i hate you?
nope.
impossible.

a place...

I walk through the trees
And the flowers and fields
And sometimes I feel
That they are like shields

Shields from reality
And sadness and sorrow
I love this place!
I’ll come back tomorrow

And then when I’m feeling
Sad or alone,
I go back to my fields
‘Cause they feel like home

I talk to the flowers,
They seem to know
Just what it’s like
To have the wind blow

My wind is imagined
Theirs is real
So I guess they must know
Just how I feel

The wind always bends them
Doesn’t care at all
But they seem resistant
To just give up and fall

I wish I was like them
So strong and so bold
But I always seem
To just crumble and fold

So I stay with my flowers
As long as I can
Till it seems almost like
They just about ran

I tell them my secrets
‘Cause they’ll never tell
And that’s why I tend them
So gentle and well

my favorite place

In the heart of the woods
Under the sky
In the middle of nowhere
Where I can “fly”

Let my thoughts wander
Far deep and far wide
And let them all tumble
Like an ocean inside

Next to a river
Next to a stream
Next to a lake
Where I can scream,
At times out of anger
Others from joy
And then out of sadness
Because of “that one boy”

This would be
My favorite place
To get away
From everyone’s face

‘Cause sometimes they make me
Feel so lost
Just drifting aimlessly
Like a snowflake of frost

I like to go
And sit alone
On a big ole rock
And pretend it’s a throne

And have some fun
Just for myself
And no one else
Not even an elf

Away from those losers
I call my best friends
I wanna walk to
Where the world ends

In the heart of those woods
Under that sky
In the middle of nowhere
I will go fly.

Deserted Island for 10 Years

You will be stranded on a deserted island for 10 years. You are allowed to bring 1 each of the following: book, movie, CD, 1 clothing item, 1 case of food, photo.

If I was to be stranded on a deserted island for 10 years, and could only bring one of each of those things, this is what I would bring…

Book: the book that I would bring with me is the Bible. I would bring the Bible because it’s actually 66 books all crammed into one. And, it’s pretty much the only book worth reading in this crazy chaotic world. Also, I love reading the Bible. It tells you everything you need to know. And there are some very entertaining books in it too. Like the Psalms, Proverbs, and Revelation. Those books seriously never get tiring. I can read them over and over and over and still be able to read them some more. And a Bible would keep me entertained for even 20 years. So I would definitely take the Bible with me to a deserted island.


Movie: the movies I would take would be "Gladiator" and "Pride & Prejudice" because those two movies are THE most amazing one of all time. You should watch them sometime, I think you might agree.


CD: I would take a CD that I would make of my favorite song by each of my favorite bands/artists. I would take a CD like that because I am the most indecisive person EVER. So I would not be able to take only one CD of one band or artist. I need the differentiation. I would hate having only one type of music to listen to for 10 years!! *shudder* it’s so much better when there’s a little bit of mix-up.


Clothing item: I would never be able to take just 1 clothing item with me anywhere. But if I absolutely had to, I would probably take a bathing suit. I’d take it because since I would be on an island, it would be surrounded by water, right? That way, I’d be able to go swimming whenever I want. And get a good tan. Ha-ha.


Case of food: I would get a case full of my favoritest foods, which include: watermelon, strawberries, apples, and a bunch of other fruits. Next, I’d stash it with “Maruchan” ramen noodle soup with the flavor of chicken. I love that stuff, and I would be able to live off of it, I am not even joking. I would not forget about ice cream, ever. I don’t think I’d be able to live very long without ice cream. It’s the best. I love it, love it, love it.


Photo: The photo I would take is very creative. And I thought of it all by myself with my absolutely amazingly fantabulous brains. I would take all of my favorite photos, and arrange them in a certain way. Then, I’d take a picture of them, and that’s the photo I would take. A photo of my favorite photos. Smart, huh?


One other thing I would take, because I would not be able to live longer than a few weeks without, is a few friends.